


The Hovering

by Living_Free



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Justice League Unlimited
Genre: Crack, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Protective Bruce Wayne, batfamily
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2018-09-12 13:56:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9074836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Living_Free/pseuds/Living_Free
Summary: Dick is a young, yummy, up-and-coming superhero. Life couldn't be better.
Bruce begs to differ. Dick is too young, little, innocent, and should have never been allowed to move out of Batman's overprotective shadow. 
Join Bruce as he endeavors to keep his little boy safe from the scourge of Earth: Men.





	

It was common knowledge that Dick Grayson was a beauty. Bruce had slowly come to this horrific realization as Dick had aged from cute-teen-boy to tight-delicious-man. Squeeze him into his Nightwing uniform, and what you had was a walking disaster. 

For Bruce, at least. 

When Dick came home to fight in Gotham, Bruce kept a close eye on his son, and promptly vanquished those whose eyes settled on the Grayson's ass for a mite too long. The "No Killing Policy" was almost shot to hell when Batman noticed The Riddler eyeing Nightwing's silhouette a little too closely. 

Bruce couldn't hover when Dick was in Blüdhaven, and had to resorted to underhand means of keeping Dick single and lonely. Pulling out the big guns, he had enlisted top level security for his boy. 

"Waller," Batman growled into the BatPhone.

"Batman," Amanda Waller confirmed. "To what do I owe the pleasure?" It was not a pleasure. Amanda hated speaking to Bruce, the man had all the personality of a juiced lemon. 

"As you know, my boy works in Blüdhaven."

"I know," Amanda hummed. "Nightwing. He's a good egg, I've established contact with him. He's polite, which is more than can be said for you. He called me Mrs. Waller, and then he invited me in for tea. Did you ever invite me for tea, Bruce?"

"I don't care for tea," Bruce said angrily. "I need you to keep an eye out for my boy. I suspect that there are...unsavory glances being directed his way."

Waller gave a full bellied laugh that nearly deafened Bruce. "He can handle himself. You need to let that boy fly, Bruce. Besides, he's already dating one of my employees. Do you know Floyd Lawton?"

"Huh?"

"He's in the Suicide Squad. He goes by the code name Deadshot."

The next morning, Dick had a very agitated phone call from Floyd saying that that wasn't him, but that Floyd needed some time, and that he went good enough for Dick, but he hoped that they could still be friends. When a red-eyed Dick came home that weekend, Bruce was there with a cup of cocoa, and wise words about how all men were dogs. 

When Dick returned to Blüdhaven, Bruce waved him away with a cheery smile. No villains would do for his boy, not on his watch.

\--------------

"Have you considered that your interference might be unhealthy, sir?"

"...shut up, Alfred."

\----------

It was not only villains that Bruce needed to worry about. 

Letting Dick join the Justice League was possibly the biggest mistake he could have ever made. Watching Wally West sling his arm around his unsuspecting little boy, lower than he would have liked, made his stomach churn. One and a half inches lower, and West's hands would be grazing upper-butt.

Dick was glowing from having thrown some fool around the training room. People tended to underestimate him because of his youth and his cute face, to their own misery. "Nice takedown there," West was purring. Bruce felt his hands clench. "Think you could teach me that move?"

"Sure," Dick chirped. "It'll have to wait though, my dad wants me to babysit my brother. He's ten."

"Cute," Wally said absently. "If you could use a hand with the tyke, I could help out-"

"I doubt that will be necessary," Bruce rumbled from next to Wally's ear. "Damian doesn't take well to strangers." Dick smiled and walked away, leaving Bruce and Wally together. "And neither do I," he whispered venomously, causing Wally to wither slightly. "Now, be on your way."

The Flash ran away as fast as he had ever run. 

\-----------

"Bruce, its not unnatural for a young man of Dick's age to want company-"

"Go away, Clark."

\-----------

"Waller, why is Oliver Queen asking after Dick?"

"Good morning to you too, Bruce," Amanda Waller replied over her cup of tea. "I don't recall inviting you into my home. Now your boy on the other hand, he invited me over for tea the other day. Such a pleasure when a child is raised right. Give Alfred my regards."

"Oliver Queen is your problem child, Waller-"

"He'll be dealt with," Waller reassured him.

"Stupid billionaires. They think they can do whatever they want with their money, and influence..." Bruce realized his hypocrisy as he slowly petered off, while Amanda Waller snorted into her tea. 

"Say, why do you keep your mask on in here? I'm the only one here, and I already know who you are."

Amanda never got her answer, as Bruce chose that moment to jump out of her living room window. With a shake of her head, Amanda Waller went back to sipping her tea.

\------------

"Father, your obsession for safeguarding Grayson's virginity is ludicrous."

"Who told you about virginity?" Bruce angrily asked his youngest.

"Well, Drake told me-"

"Go to your room, Damian!" Bruce barked. "Tim!"

"Yeah, B?"

"You're grounded!"

\-----------

"Hi Bruce," Dick called merrily over the pancakes he was flipping. Bruce smiled and sat down, happy at the sight of his happily single eldest. Just how things should be. It was only when he was sipping his coffee that he noticed a certain disturbance in the otherwise peaceful ambience. Looking up, his eyes were met with the sight of one Jason Todd, who was glowering at him from the other end of the table. 

A weaker man might have screamed, or shit his pants. Bruce, however, did no such thing, and instead coughed slightly before addressing his estranged second child. "What-what-what?"

Dick sighed as he set a steaming plate of pancakes down between them. "Bruce, we wanted to talk to you." When Bruce gestured to Dick and Jason, he nodded. "I wanted to tell you...Jason and I, we've reconnected-"

"For the past year, repeatedly-"

"Jason, please. Bruce, what he means to say is that we're dating. We're very happy together, and hope that we have your blessing."

Bruce must have passed out, because the next thing he knew was his eldest blowing gently in his face. "Bruce! Bruce, wake up!"

"Move, baby, I'll take care of this," Jason said smugly. He drew close to Bruce, and whispered, "Bruce, I killed a mafia boss in Seattle last week."

Bruce shot upright in horror, ready to smack sense into Jason, who merely backed away, looking smug. "Gotcha. I only maimed him. Dickie's got me going to anger management and therapy for my past trauma."

"Who's your doctor?" Bruce grumbled, slightly miffed that Dick and his Magic Cock could convince Jason to do something Bruce had spent years pleading for him to do. 

"Some top-secret dude. Mrs. Waller put us in touch with him."

"Bruce, are you okay?" Dick asked concernedly. Bruce looked at Dick, his little bird, now all grown up and shacking up with his maniacal foster-brother. 

"Are you?" He asked, his words heartfelt. 

Dick beamed, taking Jason's hand in his own. "I'm perfect," he said happily. "We're perfect, aren't we, honey?"

"We sure are, sunshine," Jason grinned, sneaking in a cheeky grope of Dick's bum.

"My murder muffin," Dick giggled.

Bruce smiled too, his heart finally at ease. Finally, he knew that his by was in good hands. 

\-----------

"Did you know that they asked me to officiate the wedding?"

Bruce spat his vile tea out, and choked on air. Amanda Waller watched her new tea-companion with amusement. His tea was getting cold, she thought absently as Bruce continued to flail hopelessly. 

Ah well, all the more for her.


End file.
